Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Analys om sexuella trakasserier mot kvinnor i Egypten

Artikel:


Titel: In Egypt, 99 Percent of Women Have Been Sexually Harassed
Tidnings namn: Daily News Egypt
Datum för nyhetens införande: 28 April 2013

Situation (problem):

Sexuella trakasserier mot kvinnor i Egypten

Konsekvenser:

Kvinnor får psykiska problem.
Kvinnor blir hindrade från att liva ett fullt liv.

Orsaker:

Syn på kvinnor
Religiös propaganda
Viljan att hålla ordning där män är över kvinnor
Sättet på vilket samhället reagerar på sexuellt trakassering

Åtgärder:

Från staten:
Kontrollera att lagar mot sexuellt trakassering är utförda
Starta kampanjer med målet att ändra syn på kvinnor

Från aktivister:
Starta kampanjer med målet att ändra syn på kvinnor

Från individer:
Behandla inte sexuellt trakassering som om der är okej
Stötta kvinnor som blir trakasserad

Från kvinnor själva:
Adoptera inte värderingar som tittar ner på dem.
Prova vara inte passiv när de blir sexuellt trakasserada
Ge inte upp sina rättigheter
Prata om vad händer dem

Manus:

Sexuellt trakassering mot kvinnor är ett stor problem i Egypten. Artiklen jag har valt visar hur vanligt det är. Enligt artiklen, 99% av Egyptiska kvinnor blir utsätta till sexuellt trakassering, vilket menar att det är socialt accepterad där. Som en Egyptisk kvinna, kan jag vittna om hur det är för ett problem i mitt hemland. En kvinna blir trakasserad för en tiotal eller hundratal gånger om dagen. De flesta trakasserier är verbala men fysiska trakasserier är också vanliga. De verbala trakasserier kan vara av sexuellt natur eller vara andra kränkande kommentar som blir sagda till kvinnor pga sina kön. Det händer på gatorna, i skolor och unversitet, i jobb platser och på nätet. Det finns några kända handelser som medier skrev om som grupp sexualla övergrepp i Tahrir torg och på festdagarna. Många männ attakerade kvinnor, avklädde de, våldtog de och skadade deras könsorgan med knivar, vilket visar hur våldsamt och hatiskt sexuellt trakassering är. Några veckor sedan, i Kairo Universitet, många mänliga studerande följde en kvinnlig student och kommenterade om hennes utseende. Universiteten skyllde på kvinnan och förbjud henne av att gå in i universitet, och några dagar sedan, en kvinna föll i flodet och drunknade medan hon flydde från en man som ville kasta syra på henne.

Naturligtvis, sexuellt trakassering ger kvinnor psykiska problem som PTSD. De får panik hela tiden de är ute på gatorna, speciellt när de kommer närmare män. De flesta kvinnor undviker gå ute på natten, på tomma gator, ensam, på festdagar, klä sig som de vill, bete sig som de vill, till exempel, skratta eller springa. De undviker delta i aktivititer pga hot av sexuellt trakassering. Några kvinnor slutar jobba och sitter hemma eller begår självmord pga det.

Sexuellt trakassering är ett hatbrott. Det är en resultat av synen på kvinnor som avhumaniserad kroppar som existerar för användning av män eller som mindre behöriga hus fruar. Det ökade med ökning av religös propaganda som stöttar samma syn på kvinnor, skyller på kvinnor som inte gömmer sina kropp och anser att de är ansvariga i fall de blir sexuellt trakasserad på dem senaste decennier. Det anser att kvinnor har en ond natur för de väcker mens sexuellt lust.
Sexuell trakassering syftar till att hålla ordning där män är över kvinnor genom att förodmjuka kvinnor och terrorisera de. Såsom förklaras, det hindrar kvinnor och gör att de blir inte samma fria och självuppfyllda som män. Det meddelande det skickar till de är att de är inte mer värda än sexuella rov. Det också användas för att straffa kvinnor som vågar uttrycka sig.

Sättet på vilket samhället reagerar till sexuellt trakassering stödjar det och gör att det fortsätter. Som sagt det är ett sätt på vilket ett sexistiskt samhälle undertrykker kvinnor. En vanligt svara till någon som klagar på sexuellt trakassering är ”Vill du att kvinnor klär sig som de vill?”. Familjerna, skolor, människor som vittnar sexuellt trakassering på gatorna skyller på kvinnor och lär de att inte agera på det. Modrar säger till sina dottrar att det är normal och att duktiga tjejer agerar inte på det. På andra sidan, hittar samhället orsakar till män som sexuellt trakasserar kvinnor. TV program säger att de är stackars kåta män som kan inte gifta sig. Det är samma samhället som förbjuder att kvinnor visar att de har sexuell lust eller har sex med män utan äktenskap. Sådana orsakar är baserad på samma visningar som leder till sexuellt trakassering.

För att kämpa mot sexuellt trakassering, bör staten kontrollera att lagar mot det är utförda. Staten och aktivister bör göra kampanjar med målet att ändra de visningar som orsakar till det. Kampanjar som byggar på samma visningar hjälper inte. Till exempel, kampanjar som skickar meddelandet att det är inte okej att trakassera kvinnor som gömmer sina kroppar väl, men det är okej att trakassera andra kvinnor eller att män bör sluta trakassera kvinnor bara för att de har kvinnliga släkt som kan bli trakasserad. De menar att det är viktig att inte skada män som ”ägar” kvinnor, men kvinnors själva är inte viktiga. Individer bör behandla inte sexuellt trakassering som om det är okej, utan utstöta män som trakasserar kvinnor och stötta kvinnor som blir trakasserad. Kvinnor själva bör bli av med offermentalitet och adoptera inte värderingar som tittar ner på dem. De bör också prova frysa inte när de blir sexuellt trakasserad, dra sig inte tillbaka från allmänna platser och ge inte upp sina rättigheter pga hot av sexuallt trakassering, så det blir inte konstig och mer farlig att kvinnor går ut på gatorna och inte låser sig in i hemmet efter några år.

Thursday, November 27, 2014

I Was Accused of Being Crazy (A Poem by Me Translated from Arabic)

I was accused of being crazy
When I said that the sun has a smell
And thought over about the sound of the smell of the sun
I heard the sound from a red violin
On a shelf in my primary school
I sat alone and spoke to it's rose tones
The tones danced with me on life's stage

I was accused of being crazy
When i confronted the walls of nothingness with my tender tones
The high fences built on no foundations
They remind me of death
Tales of death in my country exceed tales of life
Excuse me, tales
Excuse me, god
I'm not afraid of death
Excuse me, residents of my Cairo
I'm scared for my city to wear black
You dyed buildings and faces with mourning colors
Despite wolves' howling and wailing
Birds still recite the song of life
And I still hear it

I was accused of being crazy
When I found out that madness is not exclusive to me
I let love pass it's fingers over the strings of my heart
Your looks don't make me panic
My heart's matter doesn't concern you
I know you are annoyed by light
You cannot kill life
So you kill yourselves
Excuse me
I don't care about my accusation
If I'm accused of being crazy

Written on: 09 June 2009

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Embracing Mesntruating Vaginas

I received this email with subject line "Embracing Menstruating Vaginas":



This is my bleeding vagina.
Just like any other woman. 
Every month we go through our menstrual cycles, and we bleed. 

It took me time to be comfortable with showing my partner my menstruating vagina, but now that I have broken that barrier, I am free. I used to have my doubts and discretions, and possibly thought that this is something unattractive that needs to be hidden, but now I understand that It is a beautiful part of life.

it is not disgusting.
it is not unsanitary.
 it is not to be hidden.
There is nothing to be ashamed of.

It is a woman's personal choice whether she would like to be more or less sexually active during her period, there is no judgement in abstaining, there is no judgement in participating either. Orgasms help with cramping and de-stressing, also it is empowering to be able to feel attractive during a state that is stigmatised by society and religion as "dirty".

Vaginas are beautiful, and bleeding is normal.

Embrace the female anatomy, men (and some women). Do not be intimidated by nature.

Sincerely,


From my speech in Växjö konsthall:
"
My mother talked to me about my body on several occasions, she told me about periods to stop me from asking what are pads used for in front of people. She told me that it would be a scandal if someone saw a blood stain on my clothes … That I should hide my periods as I should hide my naked body. After I got my period, I was shocked by the way I was sexualized and was expected to act. I was expected to be less playful but I missed jumping around without feeling every atom in my body as a frame around me. I had to lock myself in the bathroom for long periods of time to avoid my father seeing me with a pad in hands. Some sellers hid pads in paper and black plastic bags as if they were illegal."
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Islam forbids women from praying, fasting or touching quran while on their periods because it considers menstruating women impure.
http://islamqa.info/en/70438

Talk About Feminist Nude Art / Protest in Växjö Konsthall



Why nudity? I was asked this question a trillion times by media, but my answers were never published as they are. Today, is the first time I will answer it without passing through somebody else’s filter … Without having somebody skew my words to pass them with his/her sexist, conformist or culture relativist agenda.

What are we protesting against? I believe the answer to this question is not hard to find, but I’ll answer it. I’ll tell you my own story with abuse directed at my body, which is just the average story of any Egyptian woman.

I remember how angry my father’s face was on that day. I was 11. We were getting ready to go to the club, and I was bouncing around him with excitement, especially that I never went out but with my parents, and they didn’t go out much, when I noticed the anger in his eyes as he looked at me. I wondered why is he angry this time till he yelled to my mother about how all my back was showing from the top I was wearing and refused to let me go out unless I change. Since my childhood, I wasn’t a person who accepts whatever she is told, especially what I found unjust or humiliating, so I resisted changing my top at first, then argued with my parents about it all day. They told me that I should cover up, or men will rape me and say I was naked in front of them … That I’ll have to cover up more as I get older … That we were Muslims, and Muslim women should wear hijab since they get their period, or at least cover parts of their bodies like their backs. They pointed at other girls at the club and asked me “Do you see any other girl dressing as you do?” and told me that I should adapt to the society I live in. All of this outraged me and didn’t make sense for me. I didn’t totally understand what rape was at this age, but I told them no one has the right to hurt me no matter what I wear, because I’m not a product made for someone else to consume, I a person who has a will … That it didn’t make sense to me to do something or refrain from doing something just to do like other people … That I didn’t choose to be a Muslim and I wished I weren’t one. This was the beginning of body policing that continued for about a decade after.

Some years earlier, I went alone with my father to the beach. There was no one else but him to shower me after I swam in the sea, but since I was taught the no one should see me naked, especially not a man, I was embarrassed to undress in front of him. When I did, he cupped my breasts and said “What are you hiding? You don’t have breasts to hide.” I felt uncomfortable, so I refused to let him shower me again, and wore a wet swimming suit all the way from Ismealia to Cairo. When my mother asked me why I didn’t shower and change, I told her what happened. She said he shouldn’t have done that, and she’s gonna talk to him about it, only to call me a liar who made this story up to get my parents divorced a few hours later.

In primary school, teachers started telling me not to fight boys back when they bully me, or they will touch my body … To wear a longer skirt, or at least wear shorts under my skirt. Girls were focred to wear vests or jackets in 40+ degrees to cover their growing breasts, while boys could wear only t-shirts. Teachers were telling us that women who don’t wear hijab will get hanged by their hairs in hell. In religion exams, I had to write that women should only work at jobs that “fit them”, dress “modestly” and have limited contact with their male colleagues or loose marks. I chose to loose marks. There was a very religious teacher who made me stand up for a whole lecture after he saw me fighting with a boy who bullied me at break time. The boy mimicked female voice and commented on my gender, and the teacher told me a girl my age shouldn’t mix with boys like that. The same teacher touched 10 and 11 years old girls.

Before I started in middle school, my father told me I should have the least possible contact with boys and not take them as friends or enemies, or again, they will touch my body.

My mother talked to me about my body on several occasions, she told me about periods to stop me from asking what are pads used for in front of people. She told me that it would be a scandal if someone saw a blood stain on my clothes … That I should hide my periods as I should hide my naked body. After I got my period, I was shocked by the way I was sexualized and was expected to act. I was expected to be less playful but I missed jumping around without feeling every atom in my body as a frame around me. I had to lock myself in the bathroom for long periods of time to avoid my father seeing me with a pad in hands. Some sellers hid pads in paper and black plastic bags as if they were illegal. My mother also told me about sexual harassment. She told me it was normal to start at my teens, and that respectful girls don’t react to it. She told me about sex before I know about it from another source … That I shouldn’t have sex before marriage … That it would show on my body if I did … That I should preserve my virginity … That I shouldn’t let a boy fool me into having sex with him, denying that girls can want sex too to make them into sex tools used by men. She said that governmental campaigns against female genital mutilation were a waste of tax money … That women who got circumcised didn’t loose anything, because she thinks women have no right to sexual desire … Because women who don’t act asexual are considered nymphomaniac by men who spend most of their time watching porn.

What my parents feared the most happened when I was in middle school. I had a crush on someone, I hugged him and decided to tell him about my feelings, so they informed school. They told me they would never let me out alone. I overheard them planning to pick me up on time everyday, so I don’t get a chance to go out with him, fearing that I would have sex, and I was shocked when they justified why people didn’t send girls to schools in the old days, so they don’t meet men, and do as I did. When they knew I sent him a love letter, my father dragged me by the hair half the way from school to home, as passers-by were watching.

I can still picture myself in the bathroom, thinking about my changing genitals that I didn’t know how they looked, and wishing people didn’t have sex organs, so that I could go out, join activities and have romantic relationships.

I had two other boyfriends later, but my parents didn’t know about them. I learned not to keep a diary, to leave nothing for them to find when they search my belongings, to change my schedule so that I could meet someone or do something between lectures. I first had sex about a week before my 18th birthday, and it felt victorious to walk around without the tissue which they deprived me from having a life to make sure it stays intact between my legs. I planned to confront them after I graduate from college ... To rent a place and live independently despite society’s prohibitions. I couldn’t imagine myself living all my life under the control of my father then under the control of a husband he would choose for me, and asking for permission every time I walk out of the door, but it psychologically tormented me to do stuff in secret when I believed that nobody had a right to my time, body or mind. I had a lot of fights with my parents who called me crazy for things like objecting to marrying girls to their rapists to prove that they “lost their virginity” through marriage, but I hid my things like my friendships because I had no power to prevent them from taking them away from me.

I had a bacterial infection, but I didn’t know what I had. It could be anything from yeast infection to cancer. Both the gynecologist I visited and my parents said a gynecological exam shouldn’t be performed on me because I was assumed to be a virgin, so I remained sick for years, and knew that my virginity is more valuable for them than my health or even my life. I told my mother I would remove the virginity myself, because I’m not a tomato sauce bottle which lid shouldn’t be opened before someone buys it, and that lid shouldn’t be more important than my health. She got terrified and said “did you loose your mind?”.

I couldn’t take it anymore, when I was 19, when they found out from relatives who had been monitoring me about a new relationship that I announced on facebook, and saw that I liked pages about women’s right to have sex before marriage and remove their hymens. I confronted them with that I wouldn’t leave my boyfriend or marry him or let them see him and decide whether I continue with him or not. They locked me up, hit me, called me a stupid prostitute who wants to do it for free and they would’ve performed a virginity test on me if I didn’t defend myself with a knife. They highly suspected I had sex with him because ”what else would he do with me for 4 hours I went out with him”. I was 19 and he was 27, but they said I was a child and he was molesting me … That they would ask police to check my virginity and get them “their right in my body” from him, because for them sex is something that men use women for, not something that women and men do together, and I am a body they own. I could escape after a week. The day of my escape was the day I started living and making my own choices. It was the happiest day of my life.

Sexual Harassment

If a person who understands Arabic walked in Egyptian streets, she/he would notice how a big percentage of people’s conversations are about women’s bodies: How they don’t cover them enough … How some woman’s arm is showing … They would hear mothers telling their sad daughters they can’t buy most of the outfits they like because they show much skin, and veiled women asking every 5 minutes if their hairline is showing. Women are told to cover up not to arouse men, which strengthens the idea that women are guilty for being born women. It’s no surprise that the more women cover up in a country, the more frequent and violent sexual harassment is there.

I got sexually harassed tens of times daily, which still gives me nightmares, but I only have time to mention a few incidents here. When I was a small child, another small child kept touching my ass in a market. I pointed at him to my parents, but they said it was normal and my father should walk behind me to prevent it. In middle school, I was sitting next to a boy when he groped my breast in front of a teacher who told me to stop when I yelled at the boy. Another time, another boy verbally harassed me, and another teacher told me I should wear looser shirts. More frequent were the insulting comments ... “What are you wearing, slut?” … “I saw your ass.” … “I wanna fuck you.” … “Hey, stupid gal!” ... “Can I pop this plastic bag in your face?.” … They commented when I dressed the way I like, when I wore school uniform, when I laughed, when I ate ice-cream, when I looked sick, when I looked angry, when I ran, when I had any body posture other than keeping my legs tight, arching my back and looking at the ground … and my mother tried so hard to teach me to change the way I do everything to avoid their harassment … To be aware of my body all the time. She yelled at me when boys harassed me and I didn’t notice, and wanted me to do like most other girls who ran away of harassment in fear of getting raped, and refused to walk with me when I wore mini-skirts. They feared rape because they thought they would have no future if they became non-virgin and couldn’t marry, but I refused to let society define my value for me and put it in my virginity and reputation of being a submissive woman. I found pride in showing that I reject their morals, and my anger was stronger than my fear. I fought back, and felt bad about myself every time I froze. I spoke up, which my parents didn’t like. My father once heated a knife and threatened to cut my tongue. He said all he wanted was for me to be silent. Speaking up was punishable by rape. He said neighbors would rape me if they heard my voice.

When I complained to my mother about harassment, she said she would talk to my father about it. My father said “Do you want to report it to police every time a man says something to you or touches you?”... “You are lying” …You’re dirty for thinking about your body and repeating what they tell you” … Those harassers will teach you the manners I failed to teach you” ... The same man who screamed “my honor” when I hugged a guy I liked said I had a complex and even girls in western countries laughed when a stranger hit them on their asses when I got touched WITHOUT MY CONSENT. The more I got harassed the more my parents limited me, so I didn’t tell them when I was harassed and attacked with a knife by two men while walking and shopping. A man who witnessed the incident insisted that I shouldn’t walk alone in an empty street after sunset. What hurt more than the harassment itself, was the re-victimization by other people, especially by my family. I was aware of how sexual harassment and rape are used to suppress woman … To make them think about avoiding rape every time the attempt to do something … To reduce them into sexual preys … When I said that to my mother she suggested sarcastically ”Go out naked and tell them here I am.”

Well, that was a good idea. When I was 18, I could dance with ease for the first time, and when I was 19, in my parent’s home, I closed my room’s door, wore forbidden items in a forbidden color: red gypsy flower, red shoes and floral stockings and my naked body. They are forbidden because they attract attention … They express individuality, when an individual, especially a woman, is supposed to hide any sign of an own identity … They show that I’m not ashamed of my body, and I refuse to carry the guilt of an alleged original sin. I took a photo and posted it on my blog later on 23 October 2011.

Now I’ll ask myself the same questions I get asked frequently and answer them:

Why don’t you protest in another way?
I did other things before I posted the nude photo and I continue doing them after I posted it. I was criticized for writing openly about my views, posting photos of myself wearing unacceptable clothes, photos with my boyfriend or creative photos a girl is not supposed to take of herself. but there’s nothing wrong with nudity. Nudity is used in art to express different things. In my photo, I express my defiance for the view that a female body is a commodity to be owned and controlled, so I don’t think I lowered my price by making a photo of my body available for free. Also, ”an action is stronger than a thousand words”, and a photo of a woman disobeying the idea that women are less intelligent sex commodities that exist for men is stronger than texts demanding bodily anatomy for women.

Do you think deviating that much from society’s norms can change it?
What else can change it? Refraining from disobeying or questioning the norms we want to change? Those who ask this question ask it because they would choose safety and social acceptance over freedom, but I prefer to be rejected for what I am, rather than be accepted for what I would be ashamed to be.

What reactions did you receive after publishing the photo?
I got both negative and positive reactions: Many controlling psychos felt threatened when a woman didn’t care to try to get society to view her as a respectful submissive woman, but got out of the system despite of all the pressure on women. I was cyber-bullied, legally prosecuted, threatened with death and rape, attacked several times in the street and kidnapped by two men and three women for the photo and for other things like leaving my father’s house and having a boyfriend. One of my kidnappers thought the only reason I resisted rape was that I wasn’t the right girl and I was a virgin protecting her virginity. Many sexists assumed that a man made me do it, because in their view, a woman cannot have enough agency to react this strongly. I also got support from many people world wide, but the messages I got from other Arab girls who shared their stories with me and made me know that I showed them it’s possible to be free meant the most for me.

Do you regret it? Why don’t you just change your name and live a normal life?
This question implies that my reaction is the problem, but what I’m reacting to and tolerating it is. I don’t regret it, and I would do it again, and again, and again.

Thank you

Update



Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Skolpresentation om inlåsning av friska personer i mentalsjukhus i Egypten

Efter en våldsam diskussion pga att dina föräldrar tror att du har konstiga åsikter, de säger att de hade ringt psykiatrisk sjukvård. De skulle komma och hämta dig på en kort tid, plåga dig och ge dig medicin för att kontrollera din hjärna. Du känner dig hotad. Inte bara ditt liv är hotad, utan allt som du är. De hatar att du har dina egna åsikter, stilar, ansiktsdrag, och kämpar för att avsluta din existens och ändra dig till en livlös kopia av alla de andra. Du försöker få de lyssna på dig, men de bara fortsätter attackera dig. Det känns som det är stängt, som du skriker högt på mitten av en öken och ingen lyssnar på dig, och du skriker ärligt av förtrycket. Sedan du vaknar. Det tar en stund förrän du griper att det är några år efter det, och du är i din egen lägenhet. Du hämtar din telefon och ringer din bästa vän för att berätta om din mardröm. Du lugnar dig när hon svarar. Det är slut, men du vet att det inte är slut för de andra …

Hej, jag heter Alyaa Elmahdy. Idag, jag ska prata om individer som är inlåsta i mentalsjukhus för att de tänker annorlunda, ateister, homosexuella, kvinnor som inte beter sig på sättet samhället vill at de beter sig på bl.a. Mina föräldrar brukade hota mig med att de skulle skicka mig till ett mentalsjukhus var jag skulle bo resten av mitt liv om jag inte ändrade mig till vad de och samhället ville att jag blev, en passiv kvinna utan personlighet.

Det har är att exempel av artiklar som visar att vad mina föraldrar har gjort är den normal reaktion till olikhet I Egypten. Även staten stödjer det.


De har är bilder på, Reem Abdelrazek, nu 22 år, en exceptionellt intelligent kvinna som vars far stängde henne i ett mentalsjukhus var hon var slagen och utsätta för elektrochock efter hon tog av sig hijab som hon var tvungen att ha på sig sedan hon var ett barn tills hon sa att hon såg en ängel som fick henne ta på sig higab igen så att de släpper henne. Hon bor nu självständigt I USA.



På hennes blog, berätter hon sin historia.

Det här är Maryam Estenfanus. Jag tror hon är 19 eller 20 år nu. Sin far, vem slog och sexuellt trakasserade henne, låst henne in på olika mentalsjukhus i flera år för att hon lämnade kristendom och hade förhållanden med förre detta muslimer. Ett av de mentalsjukhusen tillhörde en kyrka, och personalen I sjukhuset tvingade henne att be.



Maryam var en av de första få jag kände som brydde sig inte om vad folk tänker på dem och gjorde vad de trodde på, En av de få “vackra” människor som gör det lättare att leva i denne kvävande värld. Hon försökte rymma flera gånger, men hennes föräldrar hittade henne varje gång, brytade kontakt mellan henne och de personer som stödjer henne och låste henne in i sin lägenhet eller i ett mentalsjukhus. 
Få personer kampanjade för att fria Maryam.
Alla NGOs vi kontaktade vägrade hjälpa henne med orsaken att de lade sig inte i frågor som har någonting att göra med religion eller familjen, och när vi skrev om deras respons, de hotade att anmäla oss till polisen. Maryam släpptes utifrån sjukhuset efter att hon förlorade hoppet att leva som hon vill och ändrade sig under psykologiskt tryck. Hon accepterade att gifta sig med en kristen man som sexuellt trakasserad henne förut. Hon beter sig på ett ostabillt sätt nu. Ibland säger hon att hon är kristen och hon älskar sin pappa, och ibland tar hon kontakt med oss.

Ns Historia liknar Maryams på ett sätt. N är 19 år. Hon har en muslim familj och är kär i en förre detta kristen pojke. Hon försökte rymma, men sina föräldrar hittade henne med hjälp av polis. Polisen slag hennes pojkvän och kidnappade henne, sedan, låste hennes föråldrar henne på ett mentalsjukhus för en tid. Hon bor kvar med sina föräldrar och planerar för att rymma igen.

Det finns många mer historier som jag kan berätta för er, men ska berätta bara en historia till. Det är Mariam Hamdys. Jag har inte haft direkt kontakt med Mariam, men jag hoppas att en dag hon ska kunna ha kontakt med stödjande människor igen.

Mariam gjorde uppror, uttryckt sina tankar om religion och sociala normer på sociala medier, tog av slöjan som hon övertygande tog på sig, la ut bilder var hon kyssar sin pojkvän och försökte rymma ifrån detta fångläge som hon inte kunde tåla längre. Hon njutande av frihet, tog tåget ensam för det första gången i sitt liv, kände samma spänning som ett barn som börjar leva känner, tills sin föräldrar fångade henne igen.



Nu är Mariam låst in på detta hus, har ingen tillgång till en dator eller en mobil, och är tvungen att äta epilepsi medicin som en religiös psykiater föreskrev till henne bara för att hon lyder inte familj, samhället och religion.



Det finns en stor kampanj för att fria henne. Här är en facebook sida för kampanjen (https://www.facebook.com/FreeMariamHamdy), men staten, lagar och samhällt står mot hennes välja att leva fri.



Det känner så hemskt att veta att hon lidar som jag gjorde förut, men att inte kunna göra någonting för att hjälpa henne. Det minsta jag kan göra är att berätta vår historia till er.
Tack för att ni har lyssnat

Har ni frågor?

Länkar på arabiska:

Reem:

Maryam:


Mariam:

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Scattered Thoughts (fb Status Updates May 2013 - May 2014)

It's wrong to value someone according to their usefulness for someone else, and it is possible to revert it (It is possible to think that men exist to have sex with women and serve them, and eliminate any evidence that contradicts with the idea that this is their role (any evidence that they can do anything unuseful for women). This is how narcissists view others, as objects.

I remember how my parents outraged when they found out that I desired people sexually or watched porn, how my relatives called my parents when they saw that I took a silly fb quiz about sexual preferences , and how my father, who had a directory full of porn movies, worried about my "hypersexuality".
These are examples on how female sexual desire is to be silenced (by conditioning or blades) to revoke female agency, to guard the idea that women exist to be used by men. Men flaunt their horniness, claim that they have uncontrollable lust which makes them prey on us if we don't disappear (cover, stay at home, be quiet, hide of shame of our existence ...), because they want to exert power over us, not because they want to have sex with us.

I wish education encouraged me to experiment, wonder, question, think critically, seek a thorough understanding, use givens to discover or create something new ... I wish teachers didn't tell me that I didn't need to know, that I should memorize formulas without asking where they came from, or advice me not to give myself a headache. I wish art teacher didn't tell me it was wrong to draw portrait, not landscape. I wish test questions asked me to write my opinion without stating what opinion I should have.

Observation: Most people study grammar the same way they function in life. They follow rules and don't check if the big picture makes sense or not.

RIP Sahar, victim of psychological pain and abuse. I met you and chatted with you a few times, but I have known your pain for a lifetime.

The two actions mentioned in this comic (http://qahera.tumblr.com/post/61173083361) are my actions. I am white colored, but not Europian. I rescued myself, and I receive several messages from Arab women who complain from the oppression they live under daily, but the vast majority of them refuse to mention their names.

3 years ago, I was considering climbing down the pipes from the 9th floor to escape the prison i was born in.

Sexism and ageism are when you read philosophy books while your peers were still playing with dolls, and develop a struggle for your freedom since your childhood, but people assume that your boyfriends made you rebel, that you mimic their views, and that they write your blogs for you because you are a young female and they are a little or alot older males.

Egyptian women have two choices: To stay at their fathers' homes and only go out twice: once to move to their husbands' homes, and once to get buried, or to fight for their grounds and fear for their dignities, not their virginities. ‪#‎SexualHarassment‬

Wudu, prayer: Following religions makers' OCD rituals.

I think the biggest problem is the existence of people who think the same way as the Norwegian exchange student who is interviewed in this article (http://www.dagbladet.no/2014/03/19/nyheter/utenriks/egypt/kairo/universitet/32384084/) both in eastern and western countries, people who conform, and blame those who do something.

Claiming that sexual depreviation of men is the cause of sexual harassment implies that men have sexual libido, but women don't, and that women are a sexual supply for men. I get horny, but I don't get an urge to harass people. Sexual harassment is a hate crime, a tool society uses to oppress women. The same society cuts women's pussies in an attempt to remove their sexual desire, and deprives both women and men, women more than men, sexually because it requires women to stay virgins till they get married.

Most Arabs support Putin because of the political conflict between him and America. I support people living under dictatorships.

An Egyptian girl was group harassed inside Cairo University in front of faculty of law, and university adminstration, traditional and social media blamed her for wearing leggings and hoodie. One can hardly live with such feeling of anger and injustice.

I usually shave, but I stopped shaving two weeks before last action, because I was cyber bullied for not being shaved enough after previous actions. Some bullies wrote comments like "Shave to improve the quality of products". Women are not products, and whether they shave or not is non of anyone else's business.

Got street harassed as frequently and bluntly as in Arab countries by Arab men in Paris.

Went to a club in Paris with two female friends, but we were not allowed to dance because our clothes were not sexy enough. A security guard told us that rich men visit that club to watch sexy girls dancing :/

Mariam, another Mariam whose parents are religious Muslims, was taken by her parents to a MB psychiatrist called Mohammed Elmahdy, who prescribed her epilepsy medication based on that she doesn't conform to social norms. She has been locked up for a month. Her father hits her and forces her to take the medication, which may paralyze her facial muscles, and cause her convulsions.

On my left hand, between my thumb and index, in one centimeter distance, there are two scars. One made by father's hand, and one made by street harasser's knife. My father once told me that those sexual harassers will teach me the manners he failed to teach me, and when I got kidnapped and attemptedly raped, my kidnappers told me to go back to my father's jail.

19 years a hostage.

A Saudi girl is to choose between getting forcefully married off to her father's friend and sleeping with her father.

They call me cheap, because I don't consider myself a commodity. How much should I charge for a non-sexual naked photo of myself? and how much should I charge for sex to be an expensive respectful wife?

Islam is sexist, but lets assume it isn't. Are we supposed to give up equality if Islam opposes it? Are we supposed to give up our freedom of thought and follow whatever religion says?

Quran says stay at home, and Islam says that women better pray at home, not at a mosque, but lets assume it doesn't. Are we supposed to give up equality if Islam opposes it? Are we supposed to give up our freedom of thought and follow whatever religion says?

البنت اللي كانت بتحاول تساعد Maryam Estefanus اللي أهلها حبسوها في مصحات نفسية علشان حاولت تهرب من سجنهم و صاحبت ولاد من عائلات مسلمة إتحبست هي كمان في مصحة بعد ما حاولت تهرب مع صاحبها من سجن أهلها.

It's illegal to jump over embassies' fences or to be gay, but it's legal to discriminate against people.

Fuck society!

Hejab means that women are sexual preys or consumptions who should cover up not to arouse men and make them rape them or have sex outside marriage.

People watch while you are being violated, and punish you when you react. I support Firoozeh Bazrafkan.

Cultural relativists, shut up and let Arab women rescue themselves!

"I malaysisk press har det framskymtat att misshandeln skulle ha bestått i att ett av barnen, en 12-årig pojke, slagits på handen för att han vägrade att utföra sina böner."

If this is true, then their parents abused them both physically and mentally by forcing their beliefs on them.

من دولة دينية دينية لدولة دينية عسكرية :(

Instead of rejecting society's view of female bodies and females, some women try to gain its respect by adopting its view of their bodies as something shameful, dirty, an origin of sin, and distancing themselves from them, but they still carry them under their clothes and sexists still view all women as less competent sex tools which exist for men. Good luck being etherical!

My Syrian male classmates when they saw me carrying a chair:
"Can you carry it?"
"Let us carry it outside the bus for you."
"I never saw something like this before."

Me: * Lifting the chair high in one move :P *

My nudity is not humiliating. I am psychologically empowered enough to have my own self image, not to adopt my abusers' (sexist men's) image of me as a (sexual) object.

Takis Würger of Der Spiegel said sexist things, and when I pointed that out, he replied that I became sensitive and was mixing between him and Arab men (as if sexism only exists in Arab countries), then he wrote the following: "In the West, it's easy to play the moral teacher when talking about women's rights in Egypt. But we should remind ourselves that, until 1958, it was illegal for a married woman in Germany to open her own bank account without her husband's consent. Less than 100 years ago, women were not allowed to vote in Germany. And women have only been permitted to serve in combat units in the German armed forces since 2001.".

You don't support me or my cause by replying to my haters with a sexist comment like "You are afraid of a girl, cunts." :/

Sick and tired of that men are superior and women and gay men are inferior shit.

From Takis Würger's article on Der Spiegel: "Living in exile in Sweden has been lonely for Elmahdy. She lives a withdrawn life, with no friends and much fear. She has joined the feminist group Femen and also waged nude protests of her own in support of a wide range of causes."

Correction: Aliaa goes to school and plans to study film direction. She has friends in other cities in Sweden, other countries and online. She receives threats from Arab men and Nazis, but she doesn't live a terrified life as this article depicts. She joined Femen on December 2012 and left it on October 2013.

From Takis Würger's article on Der Spiegel: "Two years ago, during the revolution in Egypt, then-20-year-old Aliaa Elmahdy posted a nude photo of herself online as a form of protest against the restrictions of and mistreatment by her parents. The photo rapidly became an icon of the revolution, but different people interpreted it in different ways."

Correction: Aliaa Elmahdy posted a nude photo of herself online as a form of protest against sexist views held by most Egyptians including her parents. 

I thought of writing "My body is not a 3awra, a property or a sex tool." on the photo before I posted it.

Showed Daniel Vrangsinn off to Arab shop owners and Syrian Muslim neighbours :P

Wondering when will women start to be forbidden to wear short clothes or work in Europe, so Muslims don't get offended.

De är alla fascister, både Muslimska brödraskapet och militären. Jag är inte nöjd med den nuvarande situationen.

I was misrepresented in most of the interviews I did with the media. Like in this article:
http://www.spiegel.de/international/world/the-price-egyptian-aliaa-elmahdy-paid-for-posting-nude-photo-online-a-939541-2.html

I also made sexist people angry by wearing short skirts on the street in Egypt. ‪#‎IndividualFreedom‬

Uncompliance is not a disorder.

We went to court because the men who were inside the mosque didn't like that we were topless because they have a woman hating culture which we protested againt and didn't respect. As an expression of their culture, those men called us bitches who want to get fucked.

2010: أبويا: المتحرشين دول اللي هايربوكي علشان أنا ماعرفتش أربيكي.

You must be a male over 60 not to be considered as a child in gender and age based hierarchies.

Me: I wasn't living with my parents during my last year in Egypt.
My new Syrian female classmate: :O

Girls don't need an excuse like marriage, study or work to leave their parents' home.

To a girl who wants to take off her hegab, but is hesitant because her mother gets sad when she talks about it: Nobody has the right to get hurt of you making your choices and being yourself. Your mother is psychologically manipulating you into feeling guilty and selfish for breaking free from her control and becoming an individual, but you must know that she is the one who wrongs you, considers you as something she owns and uses for her satisfaction and doesn't care about your happiness.

Kheloud is got cyber bullied after quoting a state security soldier's verbal harassment of her: "Walk away or I will fuck you in your ass".
This is an example of how our sexist society pressures women to be silent about sexual harassment.

Women are not the same as children and they don't have special needs to be treated a special treatment, e.g. if it's ok to jail a man, it's ok to do the same with a woman.

On 22 February 2012, I was kidnapped, sexually assaulted and stolen, not by islamists, but by the help of a fake liberal, secular, atheist and feminist girl called Aya Elgohary and her mother. She's one of those who got me depressed because they made me feel that nobody is really different from the mainstream society.

Women, if sexist people call you respectful (mo7tarama), then you don't respect yourself and you accept to live by sexist norms, but if they call you a slut (sharmouta), then you are uncontrolled.

A female relative of mine: What do you want? Do you want to sleep with your boyfriend? Do it in secret. I slept with men before marriage.
Me: I slept with a man in secret for two years before, but I want to be free. I want to own my choice.

EGYPTIAN Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM IV):
Athiesm
Female Nudity

Causes:
Child abuse
Harsh economic conditions

If the current regime is secular, why are gays and atheists still prosecuted?

I did something I would have never done if I didn't break free from my parents' and society's control. I moved to my own apartment, not my husband's.

Children, their bodies and minds are not their parents' properties. Parents should not be allowed to cut their female or male children's genitalla or to indoctrinate them into a religion.

I met a guy alone to see an apartment. Noone told me to bring a male with me, and he didn't say إحنا ناس شرقيين و محترمين (like a guy who tried to rape me) to reassure me that he won't rape me or keep the door open.
I am a human, not a sexual prey.

A survivor of a psychological war of which millions fall. Scarred but free. Analyzing the tactic used. It has many names: child upbringing, gender roles, socialization, religion ...

5 years ago, at Cairo International Book Fair, My father: You want to buy a criminal psychology book for university students or a philosophy book titled "Freedom"? Do you think that it supports your argument that you're free? Girls your age read novels.

High on my brain chemistry.

A Yemeni man: Why would a beautiful girl like you ask for asylum?

Three of the five actions I did when I was a Femen member were my ideas (one of them is the mosque action), and two were Inna's and Jenny's ideas which I liked. My previous announcment about leaving Femen may NOT be used by sexist media to imply that I didn't believe in what I did.

I left Femen because I don't accept Femen leaders to decide about my actions before I do them.

Doctor: What is your name?
5 or 6 years old me: My name is naughty. (Teachers used to call me naughty at school).

My father: I wish we never let you go to school on foot or go to university by metro or bus.

Is claiming that Islam is not responsible for violence and discrimination more important than recognizing the fact that people are being killed and discriminated against, empathizing with them, and doing something about it?

Rest in peace my cousin, victim of child abuse.

Cook food like macarona bel bashamel everyday and make your bed properly. What will you do when you get married? Your husband will hit you or return you to your parents.
- I don't dream of becoming some man's servant.

An Iraqi female classmate: Women are not brave, but men are. ‪#‎SexismVictimPsychology‬

Forwarded the messages he sent me to his wife.

One and half years ago, I had to live in a refugee camp where I was sexually harassed by five different refugee men.

An arab man: Swedes make both immigrant men and women go to school to get money. They don't respect that in our countries, men are responsible for women.

An Arab man: Did you travel alone to Sweden? ... There is a difference between girls and boys. Boys can travel alone, but girls can't.

An Arab man: Do you live alone?
Me: Yes.
Man: Aren't you afraid? Don't tell that to people.
Me: Do you live alone?
Him: Yes.
Me: Aren't you afraid?
Him: I am a guy. Women are weak.

An Arab woman: Its too late. I can't continue my education.
Me: People older than 20s can continue their education.
Woman: But I barely have time to cook, clean and take care of children.
Me: But many people work and have houses and children. Women and men share housework and take care of children together.
Her: Arab men don't do anything.

After a while, Me: Yesterday night, I was out with people and didn't check when the last bus home leaves ...
Her: Do you live with your parents or are you married?
Me: No, I live alone.
Her: That's why you can go out late.

Two Arab men: She will have to work. No man will marry her after he sees all her body for free.

99% of Arabs first time we meet:
Do you live alone, with your family or with whom? Are you married?
Oh my! Did you travel to Sweden alone? Are your parents in Egypt? How come they leave you live like this?
How old are you? Why do you study with adults? You should be fostered by a Swedish family. You can't feed and clothe yourself. (I am 22).
Are you Muslim or Christian? How come you are neither Muslim nor Christian? Are your parents Muslim or Christian?

At Gothenburg train station, An Arab man: A young girl like you shouldn't wait here alone at night. You may be raped. I and other Arab men will protect you.
Me: Fuck off!
Man: I care because you are Arab, but I wouldn't care if you were Swedish.

An Arab man: Swedes brainwash Arab women. They erase our religions, customs and traditions from their brains and tell them they should have personalities.

An Eritrean student: Men and women are not the same. Men are "higher" than women.
Teacher: Why?
Student: Because Islamic and Christian religions say so.

The same man persecuted his male to female tranesexual daughter and paid for a sex change operation for his female to male transexual niece ‪#‎Sexism‬

I demand a secular constitution because Muslim and ex-Muslim women should be able to marry non-Muslims.

This is how women are terrorized to wear hegab and blamed for getting sexually bullied.
ww.youtube.com/watch?v=1DT69YJ81U0

I demand a secular constitution because "Islamic sharia is the source of restrictive legislation on individual freedoms".

I demand a secular constitution because "Islamic sharia is the source of discriminatory legislation against women and religious minorities".

I demand a secular consitution because I was tried for "contempt of religion".

I demand a secular constitution because my middle school threatened to expel me if I didn't pray after my parents complained that I left Islam and criticized it in my diary.

I demand a secular constitution because I was told that I am not Egyptian anymore after I left Islam.

Is 13 years old too young to think indoctrinated religion over, but 0 years old old enough to be labeled as a Muslim?

FGM aims to deprive women of their sexual desire to "keep them in the status of sexual objects made for the pleasure of men".

I am nazistophobic.

FUCK AUTHORITARIANISM
and fuck ageism and gymnophobia

Aliaa Magda Elmahdy: Non fasting people, unvieled women ... Can you eat publicly before sunset, drink alcohol, go to beach ... during ramadan? Do you get harassed? and how? Does your family force you to fast or pray? Please write your answer and your country of residence in a comment or message.

Magdy Abdelraheem: Yes i can.. im living a very normal life... except i just cant get alcohol, UAE

Emma Ruby: Yes, I do all the above add to that I do not give a flying toss about others standards of normality lol, UK

Adham Belhaj: No eating in public, no alcohol in ramadan or otherwise except in secret 
Egypt

Jenny Mcdonalds: They always asking me if I'm fasting or not and simply I said no as long as I'm not living with them anymore I am jordanian but I'm living in Kuwait so I can't eat publicity coz they will hunt me to jail

Kriba Hisht: I live in the US now with my primary partner so nobody can make me do anything anymore, but when I was still in Lebanon, I had to hide my atheism and wear the hijab and pretend to fast and pray because my family would never accept it any other way; my behavior was controlled by my society and the power they had over my existence. Even when in the university away from my family I had to hide in corners to eat or drink water in Ramadan so nobody would see me in case they knew me or knew my family and word would get back to them.

Reem Abdel-Razek: I eat publicly and I usually don't get harassed here in NY, sometimes I get questions from Arabic people. But back when I lived in Saudi eating in public during Ramadan meant getting thrown in Jail, so me and all non Muslim friends there avoided it.

Ladys Sattar Sbrkmnt:
انا حصالي موقف مره وانا كنت في امتحان وخلاصت ومروحه و كنت وقفه عشان اوقف تكسي لقيت كوشك صغير وكنت عطشانه سعته فا قوالت اشتري عصير روحت الكووشك وشتريت العصير وانا بدي صحب الكوشك الفلوس لقيته بي نظر ليه من فوق لي تحت وبي قرف مشيت مهتمتش بي الموضوع ركبت تكسي وكنت بشرب العصير اول مسمع صحب التكسي صوت شرب العصير وقف فجاء بي السياره وقالي انتي ازاي مش بتحترمي اخونك المسلمين اذ كنتي مسحسه كولي وشربي في بيتك قالت انا مش مسيحيه و نا حره اكل وشرب فين ونزالت وركبت تكسي ثاني

Saeed: Hi I'm from Iran, and in Iran it's illegal to eat or drink or smoke before sunset during Ramadan. If caught by cops, you'd be forced to pay a sum of some hundred dollars(not sure exactly how much). It's also been said that cops make the people who don't fast to dig up graves with little spoons!

David: هاااااي
انا ملحد و قاعدفي اسوان
و عشان اقدر اكل في رمضان براحتى بضطر اروح مكان بعيد او استنى الكل ينام العصر عشان اكل
و احيانا بضطر اكل فى الحمام عشامن محدش يشوفنى

Mayar: You asked if I'm able to eat/drink without any hassle; no I'm not. I'm forced to fast by my parents and occasionally even pray, however, I'm technically not fasting. But please bear in mind that I am only 15. I believe if someone else ate before sunset in public, they'd be either perceived as a Christian (which is a bad thing, you know, lol) or if they're a man they're a pussy/if a woman then she's probably on her period which is something she should be ashamed of, I guess. When I was on my period I was supposedly allowed to not fast etc, but my mom obligated me to not eat in front of my OWN biological father simply because that would be an indication of how I'm on my period and that's a shameful thing. Anyways, you absolutely rock! I look up to you so much. 

Mayar
Oh, also, I'm Egyptian.

Imad Iddine Habib: In Morocco is it Illegal for whom "known to be muslims" to not fast during the day of Ramadan, the article 222 of the Moroccan pemal code consider it as a crime, it is illegal too to drink alcohol in public, I've been arrested two times while eating in a park, and the harassments from people are so violent.
i Co-Founded a Mouvement against the article 222, and for the right to not fast, called MASAYMINCH, we're in the 3rd edition this year, a 18 years old boy got arrested saturday, for smoking in public.

Imad Iddine Habib - Morocco

June 2011, the last time he hit me.

What is islamic femenists' opinion on polygamy for men, unequal inheritance, hitting wives etc?

Public Display of Eating and Drinking (PDED) ‪#‎Ramadan‬

Why do some feminists define themselves as muslim feminists? I, for example, am athiest and feminist, but i define myself outright as feminist not as athiest feminist. Is it to say that they are for equality between women and men as long as it doesn't oppose islamic sharia?

Support Pussy Riot's protest inside a church and oppose Femen's protest inside a mosque because fuck logic.

Did you know? An Egyptian woman has fight or flight response whenever she walks past a man in street.